


Terry's Okay With Being Mr. Buttfart

by Davis_P_Rite



Category: LISA (Video Games)
Genre: Crack, do not take this seriously i just wrote it for fun, its not supposed to be good, literally just me word vomiting in a doc when i thot about this ships potential
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:47:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25699780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Davis_P_Rite/pseuds/Davis_P_Rite
Summary: this is just a bunch of snippets i rapid fire wrote one night after playing thru LISA the painful, terry ending up with buzzo has god tier potential
Relationships: Buzzo/Terry Hintz
Comments: 5
Kudos: 14





	Terry's Okay With Being Mr. Buttfart

Buzzo has seen some weird fucking shit in his days, that just comes with the job at this point and he’d be more concerned than anything if he went a full twenty four hours without anything fucked up happening right in front of him. All the joy mutants, druggies, horny bastards, and drag queens in the world couldn’t quite prepare him for the current situation he’s stuck in though. It’s strange in a way he’s not used to, and that’s saying quite a bit.

Columbo had come to him without much of a warning, at this point he’s used to that lack of common courtesy, everyone’s out for themselves these days, manners don’t exist and even if they did he’d be a hypocrite if he brought them up. Apparently cutting off someone’s arm is considered rude. Whatever. The visit isn’t what’s strange, no. It’s the pitiful stranger following after them like a lost puppy and blubbering like he just saw a litter of kittens get gutted with a buzz saw. 

Too specific? Maybe he’s projecting. It isn’t important. 

He barely has time to process the situation before all of a sudden the man is dumped on him, something about him refusing to leave them alone until they said they’d drop him off somewhere he could stay. Buzzo doesn’t know when the fuck he started running a hotel. He’s about to tell the whole lot of them to fuck off when Brad’s name comes up and all of a sudden all he can focus on is the current conversation, not that there’s much of one. It feels like there’s no time at all to ask any questions before the stranger is being shoved towards him and Columbo and his grubby little friends are booking it like their lives depend on it. If Buzzo was any less caught off guard he’d be tempted to take off after them, but he’s still confused and now the strange sad man is clinging to him like a lifeline. 

The other’s weight isn’t enough to really be a challenge to support, but it’s easier to sink to the ground with him as he somehow makes himself seem even smaller and sadder. He manages to regain his bearings enough to focus on what the stranger is saying, staring down at him as he sobs out his words. 

“H-he just left me, man-” There’s a gross, wet sniffling noise as the stranger wipes his nose on the inside of his jersey. Gross. “He was my only friend-” Oh. Whoever this is, he really needs higher standards. Leave it to brad to completely fuck up someone new. He’s real good at neglecting the people who need him most, clearly, and while Buzzo isn’t all that sure about this guy’s situation even he knows there’s something more to this. It’s more than just a matter of someone losing their friend, nobody gets this beat up over someone that doesn’t know them all that well. 

His arms are useless at his sides, he can’t quite bring himself to give that physical level of comfort, not as his mind runs a mile a minute, this situation feels so so similar to the one from so long ago, but at the same time it couldn’t be more different, she.. She acted nothing like this man, but she was in the same situation wasn’t she? Neglected by one of the only people that could have helped her.. Brad really never learns, does he?

It’s fine, Buzzo knows he’s wisened up since then. He’ll pick up the broken pieces this time, and the more he thinks about it the more a wide, sharp grin starts to spread across his face. Brad’s going to wish he had kept this stranger around, because this is just the beginning of something bigger. 

“Why don’t we be friends instead? I won’t abandon you like he did, promise.” 

~~~~

It doesn’t take long after that for him to realize he’ll be regretting this all long before Brad does. The stranger, Terry, he hates how quickly the fucker has grown on him. He thought the uselessness in battle and how quickly the other tends to resort to crying would piss him off, but it’s endearing in a sad deformed puppy kind of way. The puppy is ugly as shit and probably should get put out of its misery, but instead you feel like keeping it around, keeping it safe. Terry’s a lot like that.

Him taking a liking to the other is bad enough. He’d be more than happy to keep his distance and ignore his emotions, but Terry seems to have grown attached to  _ him _ as well, and that just won’t do. The first time the other shoves up into his personal space he pushes him away, but he gets this dejected look on his face and any threats and curses die on Buzzo’s tongue. He starts pushing the other away less after that. 

~~~~

He has no idea how the fuck this idiot does it, but he just watched the other set someone on fire via  _ dance _ and he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t one of the funniest and most impressive things he’s ever fucking seen. He knew Brad could do something with fire, but this guy? He can’t throw a punch to save his life but apparently dancing is different. He’s almost jealous, almost. He feels like letting Terry have this special thing for himself is for the best though. Clearly the other is just as enthusiastic, because as soon as he makes sure he didn’t accidentally roast one of the other joy boys alive he’s turning to Buzzo and grinning wide enough to give buzzo’s own unsettling smile a run for its money. Terry’s is genuine though, and Buzzo feels like a stupid romantic sap when he notices how it makes the other’s whole face light up. 

“Didja see that?” Terry is quick to launch into a retelling of what just happened, like Buzzo hadn’t been staring the whole time. He doesn’t stop him, not when he seems so enthusiastic about the whole thing, and he knows Terry notices because he swears that blinding smile gets just a bit brighter. 

~~~~

He knows the other has been in a funk, ever since the encounter with Brad earlier Terry has been tense in a way that doesn’t suit him, less of the cheering and enthusiasm and excited rambles. Or maybe he’s reading too much into it, because to most of the others Terry seems just fine, the same few still complain behind his back and those that tolerate him don’t show any concern. 

Still, Buzzo feels something should be done about it. He wouldn’t put in the effort if any of the others were feeling down, sure, but he’s declared Terry a special case. It’s personal, it has to do with Brad. He keeps telling himself it has to do with brad, he isn’t quite ready to admit it’s just because he cares about Terry himself. That’s a can of worms for another day. Instead, when he catches the other alone he jabs him in the side with his elbow. 

“Why not show me some of that fancy fire dancing of yours?” And just like that Terry lights up like he was never sad in the first place. Buzzo is glad it’s so easy, he isn’t sure he’d be any good at this if he had to put more effort into it. 

  
  


~~~~

One of the others has to be fucking with him, there’s no way Terry just so  _ happened _ to find a helmet that almost perfectly matches Buzzo’s. He’s going to find the asshole who thought it’d be funny to- oh hold on, Terry’s trying to talk to him, the murder can wait. He lets go of his machete, giving the other man a questioning look. 

“We match!” He says like it’s a big deal, and now Buzzo can’t keep his eyes from giving a slight roll. 

“And?” Despite the lack of enthusiasm, Terry picks up his slack and just gives a wide grin. 

“Well it can be a best friends thing! You’re my best friend and all, so I think it works out great!” 

Buzzo guesses he can get used to having a best friend. 

~~~~

“Why don’t you join me?” Terry calls to him, and Buzzo knows before he responds that the other has his mind set on it. “You always watch, why not actually join? Dancing isn’t all that hard, and who knows, maybe you’re hiding some secret powers of your own.” He says it like he fully believes Buzzo has fucking magic hidden up his ass that can only be shaken loose through the power of dance. 

He’s been finding it harder to say no to Terry, so he decides fuck it, why not? He knows he’s a shit dancer, and the faster the other man realizes it too the faster Buzzo can avoid ever having to do this again. 

It takes exactly two minutes for Terry to decide he has to  _ teach _ Buzzo, because of course instead of sending him off he decides to help him out. He doesn’t know why he expected anything less from the lord of the tutorial, whatever that means. 

“Come on, you’ve got it! Step like this- there you go! And like that, you’re getting it.” Buzzo has decided Terry is entirely too close and hadn’t expected this to turn into what looks like the more talented friend teaching their helpless idiot friend to dance before prom so they don’t step on their date’s feet, Buzzo can feel the shitty romcom vibes in the air, next thing you know he’ll be ditching the date for the best friend- oh. Yeah, okay, a bit late to not do that he supposes. 

~~~~

Terry is laughing so hard Buzzo worries he’ll pass out from lack of oxygen. He feels his cheeks heating up and ducks his head in embarrassment. 

“It’s not that funny! Cut it out, c’mon, you’re just being a fucking asshole at this point, shut up!” He kicks at him without any real intent of harm, anyone else and he’d be trying to break their ribs. 

“Buttfart-” He hears the other giggle out, and responds by groaning and trying to melt into the ground, laying flat on his back and covering his eyes with one of his arms while hoping the dirt opens up to accept him for his eternal slumber. 

Eventually the laughter dies down and he hears movement, then feels a weight on top of him. He uncovers his eyes, an amused snort leaving him when he sees Terry’s face in his own. 

“It’s okay, I think I can live with being Mr. Buttfart.” Terry snickers at him, and there’s no chance for Buzzo to react beyond the surprised huff that escapes his throat because the other is quick to press a kiss to his lips and shut him up.

~~~~

In the end he’s right, Brad does regret giving Terry up. Only because he feels like he needs the world’s biggest jug of bleach after watching the two sappy ass lovebirds stay glued at the hip through the entirety of their next encounter. 

Can’t they just cut off his other arm and get it over with? He doesn’t like the looks Garth is giving the pair, he expects an ungodly amount of shitty gay porn in the coming days. 


End file.
